Even More Cowbell

Here's another Evil Twin story to make you happy.

Shortly after the great car-napping, my brother decided he was going to up the ante. It was January of our Junior year of high school, and the foreign exchange student (that I stayed with in Costa Rica) was up on his half of the exchange program.

At about midnight, my brother decides that he wants to start a fire. He preps the fireplace, but it won't stay lit. Being the smart cookie he is, he went and got BBQ lighter fluid. Still no luck, no fire. Apparently not wanting to be outsmarted by the fireplace, he pulls in the big guns. That's right, the gasoline cannister for the lawn mower. He douses the logs and throws a match on the fire. With predictable results. It's truly amazing what will happen when you don't open the flue.

This caused the smoke detector to go off, which woke up my sister, mother and the exchange student. Me, I slept through it. It also burned all the hair off the front of his body. When he got home from kiddy jail 3 days later, his eyebrows had just started to grow back in. I bet he was a real big hit there.

Oh, and I had the extreme priviledge of explaining where my brother had gone to the foreign exchange student. In Spanish.

This Thread Needs More Cowbell

With the news enough to make a sane persons blood boil posted over at Neil's and Jen's , I've decided that the world needs a little more happy. Sure, that story is profoundly disturbing, and I'll probably make a post about it later, but I've decided to write a run-on sentence and post about something happy.

I went to Petco this afternoon to get dog food for the labradork, and I also ended up picking up some new toys for her. It makes me happy thinking of how she's going to get all excited about a new toy, and then I get to see her romping and being silly. I found this toy called a cuz, which they have loads of at the dog park that we take Roxy to and she loves those toys, so I bought one for her.

I got home and gave it to her, and she happily pranced around the house making it squeak. Awhile later, it was time for her walk. We walked downstairs and she got to her favorite spot. She did her business in record time, and rushed back to the elevator. I was a bit confused, until I opened the door to the condo. She ran to her new toy and she hasn't stopped playing with it since. Occasionally, she'll look out from the guest bedroom to make sure I'm still around, wag her tail at me, then squeak her cuz and disappear back into the bedroom.

Happy dogs are truly good for the soul.

squeak, squeak, squeak!

Redux -- II

Many tests were had at the doctor's office. Chest x-rays, spirographs, and some weird inhale the pretty smoke thing. The doctor was really disappointed I didn't have asthmal pnemonia. Seriously, he was very bummed out that I just have bronchitis. He even went as far to say that maybe the tests weren't just good efforts on my part. Hello?! How hard is it to blow into a tube? How can you fail that test?

I've been put on some pretty massive antibiotics, but none of the cool cough medicine, because I'm violently allergic to codeine. My boss has quarentined me to my house. He doesn't want me coming in at all if there's even the remotest chance I'll pass this along. You know, because he's like going on vacation 'n stuff. I wonder if he's going to pay for all this time off he's forcing me to take. It's not like I made the decision to stay home, I was told to stay home.

I'm going to go take some theraflu, an antibiotic, grab the puppy and kitty and curl up in the bed. There shall be much sleep and Voltron watching in my future today.

Evil Twin

As Jen and I have discovered, we both have evil twins. That's so cool. Also, I seem to know A LOT of twins. One of my closest friends from high school, lives in the DC area, and yep, she's a twin. When I was growing up, my next door neighbors were twins. The people who lived behind me? Yeah, they had twin sons. Both houses on the corner down the street? Twins, and twins. Five doors down in the other direction? You guessed it, twins too. And there were about 5 sets of twins at my high school. Must be something in the water in the greater Toledo area.

Look forward to some blogging about my evil twin brother. I'm looking forward to sharing the stories. And for those of you that have evil twins, share your stories too. Or share your evil family member stories if you don't have a twin. We've all got at least one crazy growing on the family tree.

NOTE: I tell stories about my brother as a way of dealing with it. My parents used to try to hide how disruptive he was -- you know the whole keep the family secrets thing. So, I'll respect any decisions to tell or not to tell.

APPETIZER: When we were 15, my brother stole mom's car for a joy ride. To meet a girl he met at the roller rink. He managed to drive the 25 miles to the other side of town, where upon he promptly backed the car up into a porch trying to parallel park. He then fled the scene of the crime and ended up hitting another car in the parking lot of a 7-11. Kiddy jailarity ensued. Probation ensued. Weekly visits with the parole officer ensued. No license until he was 18 ensued. And finally, a letter from my parents to the insurance company telling them that they would never let him drive one of their cars or try to insure him if they wished to keep their coverage ensued.

Guilt

I've been feeling really conflicted about my job lately. Part of me feels like I've been out sick too much lately, but then I realize that I've had some legitimate health concerns that need to be taken care of. [Yeah, I ended a sentence with a preposition: Bite me.] I probably wouldn't feel as guilty about this if we were given more than 5 sick days a year. Five days don't get you very far when you have chronic conditions like migraines and allergies. Heaven forbid you actually get sick with the flu, or do something really crazy like bust your neck.

Also, I've been really bored at work. As in I don't really have a lot to do, so I spend a lot of my time surfing the internet. I've asked for things to do, and haven't really received any direction -- although I do have a new project on tap. It's relatively interesting so far, and promises to get a bit more complicated. So, in summary, I feel guilty because I know I could be doing a lot more than what I'm doing now.

The cherry on top of this whole thing, is that my paycheck was laying on my desk when I got to work this morning. The envelope was thicker than normal, so I actually opened this one. [I usually don't open my checks, because they're really just paystubs from my direct deposit.] Turns out there's a letter in it from the CEO praising my work and telling me how much they appreciate me.

Oh, any that my base salary has been increased (by a semi-substantial amount.) I'm not complaining about getting a raise. So, maybe I shouldn't feel so guilty after all -- or maybe I should feel more guilty. Screw it. I'm going to go shopping.

Sickness Redux

I had my very first needle to the neck yesterday, and all in all, it wasn't that bad of an experience. It didn't hurt, per se, it was more of an uncomfortable thing, or a weird sensation type of thing. In terms of general health, I felt pretty off after the experience -- light headed, dizzy, nauseated, stiff and sore. In terms of my neck pain, it's been dramatically reduced. So, we'll call this one even.

I'm still fighting whatever this cold is off. I drug myself into work this morning, and upon speaking with me my boss said "I'd rather you be at home than here, because I don't want anyone else to get sick." So, I got sent home to bask in the relative comfort of my own cozy home.

I do have an appointment with the doctor at 2:30 today. I figured since it's been a week and I'm still coughing hard enough that I sometimes vomit, I should get a professional involved in the situation. More news to follow. Wish me luck, I'm hoping this is just a really bad cold and nothing else.

Pain in My Culo

I've been fighting off a nasty cold since Weds. and I have to report that it's winning. The constant coughing and snotting and draining has me totally over myself. On the plus side, the Tylenol Day and Night Severe Cold stuff is doing a good job of making me feel more or less human. On the negative, I haven't been able to take any of my muscle relaxants or pain killers because they'll interact with each other and cause the world to explode. So, I'm in a lot of pain.

Of course, as of Friday, I wouldn't have been allowed to take any of my neck meds. Part of the injection 'therapy' is that one is not allowed to take any NSIADs for 72 hours prior to the procedure. And, of course, one (if not both) of my meds fall under that category.

I'm hoping this needle to the neck thing will help with the pain, but I have to confess that I'm getting a little weirded out by it. I've been having thoughts and dreams of what could go wrong. Like, say, getting paralysed, or having permanent nerve damage. I'm sure that these are common worries, and I shouldn't be worried about it at all, but I can't help it.

I can already tell I'm going to be a real nutcase come Monday morning when it's supposed to happen. Hopefully, all will go well. At the very least I don't have to go to work. Power of positive thinking, power of positive thinking.

Watch: October

And rounding out the trifecta are things I'm watching on TV and DVD. For some reason I've been watching a lot of anime and cartoons lately, but they're good programs.

• Howl's Moving Castle
• Voltron: Blue Lion Collection
• Avatar: The Last Airbender (Season 1)
• Battlestar Galactica (Season 3 -- TV)
• House (Season 3 -- TV)
• Doctor Who (Season 2 -- TV)
• Dead Like Me (TV)

I've got Charmed, Stargate SG-1, and Eden's Bowy on backlog, but I'll eventually get around to those. And the Major made me watch Lisa Lampanelli's stand up routine tonight. Oh. Sweet. Crassness. She has got one foul mouth on her -- for most of the show, my mouth was on the floor in shock that she said most of the things she said.

Play: October

If anyone's a gamer (or a gaymer, in the most crass, obnoxious, niche coining of a term I've read this year ... thanks for nothing ign.com), here's what I'm playing currently or will be shortly. Strap your controllers on and fire up the Playstation 2; it's a party.

• Valkyrie Profile 2: Silmeria
• Tales of the Abyss
• Final Fantasy XII
• The Legend of Zelda, Twilight Princess

And games I've recently finished playing:

• Valkyrie Profile: Lenneth
• Blade Dancer
• Grandia III

Yes, I'm a huge RPG junkie -- and it's very nice of Major Man to tolerate my habits.

Read: October

This is what I'm getting myself into this month. You'll most likely notice a dearth of Literature in comparision with literature. But hey, I've got my MA in Spanish Literature, so I read all the capital L literature I'm going to for quite some time.

• The Greatest Story Ever Sold (Author goes here)
• Gardens of the Moon (Steven Erikson)
• The Amulet of Samarkand (Jonathan Stroud)
• Shaman's Apprentice and Forest Mage (Robin Hobb)
• Spellbinder (Melanie Rawn)
• State of Denial (Bob Woodward)
• Druid's Sword (Sara Douglass)

Other books that I've recently read, and recommend:

• La Silla del aguila (Carlos Fuentes)
• House of Chains (Steven Erikson)
• Ilium and Olympus (Dan Simmons)
• The Troy Game (books 1-3) (Sara Douglass)
• Black Order (James Rollins)

There's something to be said for having a long commute on the metro, no?